you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Woke up backwards on a recliner
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize