What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
