we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
