guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
