I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize
