I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
