"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
