I hope mine doesn't look like that
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Randomize
