After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Randomize
