just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
