Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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