as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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