alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize