I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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