I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
