i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
