I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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