I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
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