I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I'm way too hungover for life right now
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
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