She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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