Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
