it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
