HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
