he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
