At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
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