Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
