We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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