Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
