I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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