do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
