its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
