dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
4 words: hood of his car
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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