what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
