just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
