if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize