I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
