Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
my shit smells like andre
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize
