saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
