from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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