Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Randomize
