I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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