i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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