i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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