What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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