Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
