he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
