I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
