so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
