I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
