Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
