he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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