I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize
